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If you are experiencing abuse, you are not alone, and it is not your fault. Whether you are ready to leave today or are just starting to look at your options, this guide to domestic violence shelters will help you find a safe place to go and understand your rights.
Get Immediate Help
If you are in immediate danger, call 911. If you need to talk to someone safely and anonymously to plan your next move, contact these 24/7 resources:
- National Domestic Violence Hotline: Call 800-799-SAFE (7233), text “START” to 88788, or chat online at thehotline.org.
- StrongHearts Native Helpline: (For Native Americans/Alaska Natives) Call or text 1-844-7NATIVE (762-8483)
- Crisis Text Line: Text HOME to 741741.
How to Find a Shelter Near You
Domestic violence shelters (sometimes called “safe houses”) provide a secure, confidential location where survivors can stay.
- DomesticShelters.org: This is a comprehensive database in the U.S. and Canada. You can search by zip code and filter for specific needs (like pets or language services).
- Your State Coalition: Every state has a “Coalition Against Domestic Violence” or something like it. They maintain a list of every licensed program in your state.
- Call 211: Operators can direct you to the nearest emergency shelter and tell you if they currently have open beds. Some 211 centers are open 24/7; others may have limited hours.
Most shelters are free and can usually help with basics like food and toiletries, safety planning, emotional support, and referrals for housing and legal help. But specific rules—like how long you can stay, who can visit, and what services are offered—depend on the individual shelter and state or tribal regulations.
If a local shelter is full, they often work with “overflow” programs, providing hotel vouchers or connecting you with a shelter in a neighboring county. Don’t give up after one phone call.
Even if you have pets or a service animal, staff can often help you find safe options for them. You do not have to figure any of this out alone.
The Emergency “Go-Bag” Checklist
If you are planning to go to a domestic violence shelter, try to gather these items and keep them in a safe place (like a trusted friend’s house or a hidden spot). Do not risk your safety to get these if you must leave in a hurry.
| Category | Items to Pack |
| Identification | Driver’s license, Green Card, Passports, Birth Certificates (yours and your children’s), Social Security cards. |
| Financial | Cash (hidden), debit/credit cards in your name, checkbook. |
| Legal | Marriage license, divorce papers, copies of leases, or Restraining Orders. |
| Medical | At least a 7-day supply of prescriptions, health insurance cards, and vaccination records. |
| Digital Safety | A spare “burner” phone if possible. Disable “Share My Location” and GPS tracking on your current phone. |
What to Expect When You Get to a Shelter
Many survivors are hesitant to go to a domestic violence shelter because they don’t know what it’s like. While every location is different, most offer:
- Confidentiality: The address is unlisted to keep residents safe.
- Shelter: A place to sleep for you (and your children, if you have them).
- Basic Needs: Food, clothing, and toiletries are usually provided.
- Transportation: Offering bus passes or ride vouchers when needed.
- Childcare: Some offer on-site childcare or supervised play during support groups, counseling, etc.
- Documentation: They may offer help replacing important documents or safely retrieving them when possible (like IDs, birth certificates, Social Security cards, or prescriptions).
- Emotional & Practical Support: Many shelters offer emotional and practical support, such as support groups, help applying for benefits, referrals to legal aid, immigration help or tenants-rights organizations.
- Referrals: They can refer you to partner programs in the community.
Exact services can differ a lot from one program to another, so it’s completely okay to ask the question, “What kinds of support do you offer while I’m there?”
Your Rights as a Low-Income Survivor
Being low income should never prevent you from seeking safety. There are federal and state protections designed to help survivors maintain housing and protect their privacy — but the details can vary depending on where you live and what type of housing you’re in.
Under the Violence Against Women Act (VAWA), survivors of domestic violence, dating violence, sexual assault, or stalking have protections in many VAWA-covered federally assisted housing programs (including most HUD-assisted housing and Section 8 programs).
In many covered programs:
- You usually cannot be evicted or denied housing just because you are a survivor.
- Abuse generally cannot be counted against you as a lease violation.
- The housing provider may be able to remove the abuser from the lease while allowing you to stay.
- You can request an emergency transfer to another available unit if you feel unsafe.
These protections apply only to certain housing programs. A local advocate or legal aid office can help you understand what applies to you.
In addition, many states offer a substitute mailing address to help keep your physical address private in public records (like DMV or voter registration). Rules vary by state. A local domestic violence program can help you apply.
Depending on your state, you may also have the right to:
- Break a lease early without penalty (with documentation)
- Apply for crime victim compensation
- Request a protection order (restraining order)
Laws vary by state and tribe. For advice about your specific situation, talk to a local advocate or legal aid attorney.
What Happens Next
A domestic violence shelter stay is usually one step in a longer journey, not the final destination.
Shelter staff and advocates can often help you:
- Plan where you’ll go after your stay—whether that’s another program, a friend’s home, transitional housing, or an apartment of your own.
- Connect with housing programs or rental‑assistance options, where available.
- Get in touch with legal aid around protection orders, custody, immigration, or other concerns.
- Apply for benefits and programs that can help with food, health care, and basic bills.
- Understand your options if child protective services (CPS) or the police are involved.
Laws and procedures around restraining orders, CPS, and mandatory reporting vary a lot by state, tribe, and even by county. Because of that, it’s best to:
- Treat anything you read online—including this article—as general information, not legal advice.
- Ask a local advocate or legal aid attorney to review the specific steps you’re thinking about.
If your situation involves immigration, disability, LGBTQ+ identity, or other factors that affect your safety, advocates can often point you to organizations that specialize in those areas.
Relief Recap
If you’re thinking about domestic violence shelters, you’re already doing something brave: you’re imagining a life where you and your kids are safer. You don’t have to make every decision today. You don’t have to have the “perfect plan.” You’re allowed to feel scared, sad, angry, or totally numb.
What matters most is that you are not alone. There are people whose entire job is to help you think through options, protect your safety as much as possible, and support you whether you choose to leave now, later, or not at all.
Reaching out—to a hotline, a shelter, a trusted friend, or a local advocate—is a strong, courageous step. You deserve to be safe. You’re in our prayers.
